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One Should Never Call Out A Name In Public Unless It Is Absolutely Unavoidable: Where Is Your Chivalry - by Alfred


   It is a bold advertisement of poor breeding to shout a friend's name in public in order to get his or her attention.

   It is often unpleasant or uncomfortable to one who not only has been suddenly thrust without warning into the spotlight among those within earshot; as they very often have been pushed from a comfort zone of the inconspicuous to the conspicuous.

   The matter becomes worse if the one whose name is called is of a shy disposition; even if it is to a very limited degree.

   Even though unspoken, the discomfort is felt and would be associated with you.
   He or She would see & think of you as that loud friend that would very readily call out their name in public without any consideration of their comfort or discomfort and to whether or not they would like everybody in the world to know their name.
   Though it would never be said, the person whose name is called and even all those who hear & observe what you have done would classify you as one who is rather Indiscreet.
   And guess what?
    You Are.

   I'm afraid that is exactly the earned impression you pass across when you call someone's name out in public.

   You would obviously seem like someone who also wouldn't mind saying or even screaming other things out loud in public (including things that would very much be preferred to be left private).

    No one who is careful would ever tell you anything of any delicacy. You would become the friend in the group that always feels left out; the one who feels that no one ever tells anything. The one who always finds out everything too late or not at all.

    However, it is this thing which you think a little thing that is the cause of your state of: 'belonging' but at the same time not being included intimately within your group of close friends or associates.

    If someone whose attention you would like to get is quite a distance from you and perhaps still moving away, and you don't think you can hurry quickly enough to catch up with them. Rather than shouting out their name in public, shout something generic but polite & respectful like "EXCUSE ME!.... EXCUSE ME!..."  or "EXCUSE ME, SIR! ... EXCUSE ME, SIR,"  as you run forward to meet up with them. Don't worry, the fact that you've left out their name doesn't change the desired effect of drawing their singular attention. They'll know your voice so they'll know it's you. No names have to be screamed out to the hearing of all passersby.

   You may say, well calling out something generic may attract even more attention since everybody would probably think it's them. Well, No. That's a misconception on your part. Many people who can't recognize your voice won't even turn to look at you especially in a busy city. The few among those who don't recognize your voice but still turn to look at you would look away just as quickly if their curiosity is met with a face they can't recognize. Not to mention they would notice your attention isn't on them but on someone else.

   Also, if someone you are calling doesn't turn around, those around him or her who do would alert them that someone is calling them.

   Please be reminded that even shouting something generic as described should only be done if it is too late to catch up with them no matter how fast you walk or run (if running is appropriate at the time).

   I must confess due to my class and station in life I cannot even call out something generic to someone whose attention I wish to draw, unless as a definite last resort.
   If I were in a Cafe having Tea and I noticed you pass by the window, rather than shouting or running out the Cafe without paying, while habouring the honest intention of rushing back in again afterwards, I would send you a Text simply stating, "I'm in the Cafe you just passed. Called 'So & So' Cafe. Please come in and have a Treat with me if you can spare the time. It's on me. I would certainly enjoy to have the pleasure of your company on this lovely day."
   Or I could simply call you if the Cafe has a certain privacy to it.

   If the situation was different and I am walking behind you, trying to catch up with you. I would either Text you a simple, "I Am Behind You" or I would call you and say, "Look Behind You."  
   It is a question of Class, Station In Life, & Personality in my case.

   You Are What You Think You Are. And You Are In The Class You Put Yourself In.


   Remember Alfredonian Etiquette is not to imprison self expression or individuality but to prevent the destruction of civilization by bringing order to self expression.


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